Happy 1st Birthday, Erik!

My little sack of sugar is one-years-old today! Erik has such a sweet temperament.  He is almost twenty pounds and currently has four teeth and a gorgeous head of curly hair. He has the most beautiful blue eyes with  eyelashes that most women would give anything to have. He isn't walking yet, but he is cruising around holding on to furniture and has stood up all by himself for a minute or two...so walking is coming along.

Erik loves: Casey, Curly, his pacifier, his lamb blankie, his folks and of course being held. He loves to drop food off of his highchair. He loves bath time. He loves to go for walks in his stroller and he likes going for bike rides in his special little seat. He loves to play in Casey's room. He loves music, he likes to dance and he likes being tickled!

Erik's nicknames: Gugga, buddy, brotha and sack of sugar.

I went into labor around 1 a.m. on Dec. 29th, but the contractions kept stopping. I walked around and I did some stretching. I felt better, so I went back to bed, only to get up and walk around  again at 4 a.m. and 6 a.m. We finally called the grandparents around 8 a.m. and let them know Erik might be arriving today. Mor-Mor and Nana came over to hang out with Casey and join me for walks. I walked my neighborhood all morning and most of the afternoon. I circled El Camino High School's track several times and climbed the bleachers. I even went for a ride on the swings. Finally, at around 5 p.m. my contractions started to get more intense. It was finally time to head to the hospital. I avoided going to the hospital too early, because my goal was to avoid another c-section. 

After about 13 hours of labor with Casey, I had an emergency c-section. I felt like I failed after my c-section, it wasn't rational, I definitely had some postpartum depression, but that is how I felt. When I became pregnant with Erik,  I knew I wanted to try and have a different birth experience.

When we arrived to the hospital I found out I was 4cm dilated!! We called our Mom's and told them to come on down and hang out with us. I walked the halls, bounced on the birthing ball, but my contractions would not stay together. I did not want pitocin, I had had that with Casey and then I couldn't manage my contractions and then my epidural didn't work. My labor with Casey was a mess.

With Erik, I really wanted to try and have a drug free birth. I didn't even have an IV  attached to me. I just had a hep lock. By 10 p.m., not much had changed. Everyone was getting tired. We sent the Mom's home and told them we would call if my labor took off. At 11:30 p.m. my doctor decided to break my water. All of a sudden, I was in CRAZY labor. Pedar said I never opened my eyes after they broke my water. Next thing I knew I was pushing. I remember thinking, "I'm doing it! I'm having my baby!" I felt pain, but it was mostly manageable.  At one point I did want relief, but it was too late. After about 45 minutes of pushing, my doctor said, "Reach down and get your baby, Nora." I reached down and felt his tiny armpits and lifted him onto my chest. I will never forget that feeling. I was laughing and crying at the same time.  

Erik Kenneth Bruce was born on December 30th at 12:59 a.m.

So many people told me that I probably wouldn't be able to avoid a c-section. That a vbac was too dangerous for me and the baby, especially the baby. The comments made me feel like I was going to harm him by trying for a vbac, like it was a selfish decision. My sister Bridget and a few others really supported me to go for it, and I am so grateful that I didn't fold. I am so proud of myself for canceling my c-section. 


I hired Consie Kunst, a doula and she prepared me for what I needed to do to avoid another c-section.  I am so grateful that I hired Consie and gave myself the experience that I wanted and needed. Consie was absolutely perfect.  She believed in me and that allowed me to believe as well. 

I prayed a lot about my decision. I prayed that the baby and I would be fine. I can't explain it, I just knew that everything would be OK. I had always imagined that I would have a birth like Erik's.

Pedar was amazed at the entire experience. He was scared, but he knew I couldn't just walk into the hospital and lay down in an operating room without trying for what I really wanted. I am lucky to be married to such a calm and supportive man.  He was so proud of me.

Having had a natural birth still makes me feel like I can do anything. Erik's birth experience was the complete opposite of Casey's. I had no postpartum depression. Erik took to nursing so easily. I nursed him for ten months, that is when he finally took a bottle, and then he was done with nursing, which was absolutely fine with me!

Erik's first year was so beautiful. He completes our family. We are so happy. Happy Birthday, Erik. We love you so much!